Organ and Tissue Donation..my story

I recently read a blog post from an old High School friend about how Organ donation has touched her life- her young son has recently had a Kidney transplant that has saved his life. I thought maybe it was time that I shared my story about organ and tissue donation. Especially since April was Organ/Tissue donation month but I didn't do anything with it because I was busy supporting Autism Awareness. But Organ/Tissue donation is SO important that I can't just let it go by without sharing my story.

As many of you know I was married once before to a fabulous man named David Rolfe. We had a beautiful baby boy together. This last April would have been our 10 year wedding anniversary but we only made it 2 1/2 years before David passed away. He passed away from an accidental prescription drug overdose, which in itself is a whole other story and cause that I struggle with. Initially I was in total and absolute shock. I didn't see his death coming-although in hind sight I had completely been prepared for it.

I remember laying on my mom and dads bed later on the same day of his death and just trying to sleep...trying to avoid the pain as much as possible. My Dad came in and said that I had a phone call and that it was an important one that I needed to take. He tried to prepare me for the phone call, but it turns out he didn't need to. The phone call was from Intermountain Donor Services of Utah. They were calling to ask me if I would be willing to sign consent for tissue donation from David's body. It might sound totally "not right", but I was actually happy to hear from them. I had just assumed that because David died unattended (not hooked up to life support) that he wouldn't be able to be an organ/tissue donor, but I was wrong! The Donor Services of Utah were calling because he WAS still eligible to donate tissues and bone. As I said before...my Dad expected this call to be a call that I wasn't ready to handle- but he was wrong...I was VERY ready to handle it and it actually brought me a great amount of peace to know that Davids death wasn't completely pointless...his death was going to give others opportunities that were at that point out of their reach.

David was able to help people see again with the donation of his corneas.
David was able to help people who had been horribly broken heal again with new bones.
David was able to help people with massive burns get new skin and a chance to heal properly with that skin.
David was able to help numerous people with skin, corneas, bones, large veins and various other tissues.
And yes, we did still have an open casket viewing. He looked NO different then if he hadn't been a donor, but I KNEW what gifts he had given to others.

You might be thinking that I had been a heartless wife and that I wasn't in my right mind at the time of his death. I know I had people close to me that really struggled with this decision of mine. But let me explain why the decision was so easy to me and why it brought me such peace in this time of heartache.

Only 3 or 4 years earlier then Davids death my Uncle Steve died while waiting for a Kidney transplant. Now, Steve was a lucky man because he had some serious health problems throughout his life and yet had many miracles. Some years before Steves death he was actually a recipient of a donor liver. This allowed him to become healthy again and to go on and have 2 more BEAUTIFUL girls. This liver allowed him to continue on being the father of his other 3 children...giving them precious time to get to know him and learn from him. When he died while waiting for the Kidney transplant it was a sad time for our family because we know he could have had many more great years had he only had a Kidney donor in time. Somebody's greatest heartache, the loss of a loved one, is the time of great joy and hope for a recipient family.

When Steve died I had been dating David. I was attending college and gave speeches two different times about the importance of being a Organ/Tissue donor. David and I had in depth discussions about the importance of being a donor and we both clearly knew each others wishes. We were young. We didn't have any reason to think that either of us would die early, but we discussed it anyway...and look at the peace it brought me when he did die young, unexpectedly. Our discussions gave me the uttermost peace, knowing that David would approve of my decision to have him be a donor.

Times have changed a little bit in the last 8 years. Laws have changed where YOU get to make the decision to be a donor, where when David died it really came down to your families consent. Even if you wanted to be a donor, your family had to give the ok after your death. Now YOU get to decide. You can put yourself on a registry and if anything were to happen YOU would know that you were able to help others in being a donor. But it's also SO important to still talk with your families. Make them aware of your desires and decisions so that if something were to happen to you it wouldn't be a surprise to them when the Donor Teams come knocking, wanting what you have given them permission to have. I know it might sound callous, but come on...once you are gone you no longer need your organs and tissues. But there is somebody out there that desperately needs them! It often times means life or death to the recipients.

Here is just a bit of information from the website "Donate Life".

"There are now more than 100,000 people in the United States waiting for lifesaving organ transplants. A million more suffer from blindness, medical conditions or devastating injuries that can be successfully treated with donated corneas or tissue. Everyone is likely to have a neighbor, a friend or even a family member who has been or will be affected by organ or tissue donation. Last year, more than 28,000 lives were saved through organ transplants. These
were necessary because no other medical treatment offered the possibility of recovery from organ failure. Similarly, tissue transplants are often a necessary part of medical treatment for a multitude of diseases and injuries, including bone fracture, ligament repair and heart surgery. More than one million life-enhancing tissue transplants are performed each year, offering patients a new chance at healthy, productive and normal lives."

Please talk with your loved ones TODAY about what would happen if you were to unexpectedly die. I know nobody thinks it will happen to them, but statistics say that it WILL happen to some of us. I was only 25 years old and a widow! Nobody thinks that is going to happen to them. Talk with your loved ones and decide TODAY if you are going to be a donor. Make sure your loved ones know your wishes and desires. And then go to "YES UTAH" and sign up to be a donor. There are literally thousands of people anxiously waiting for donors to save and improve their own loved ones lives. And not nearly enough donors to fill the need. And don't let your own health limitations deter you! Many people can still be donors that would have originally thought they could't because of disease, sickness and such. Check in to it and find out what you can do...you might be surprised to find out how much you would be able to help somebody if you were to die unexpectedly. We all obviously want to keep our family close and nobody wants a death in their family, but if it were to happen today would you be ready to make a donor decision? I am.